In the supreme adaptation of means to an end...
In the supreme adaptation of
means to an end there is a constant nobility, for neither ambition nor virtue
is the essential of a perfect action How shall you contemplate with
indifference the career of an artist whom genius or good guidance has
compelled to exercise his peculiar skill, to indulge his finer aptitudes? A
masterly theft rises in its claim to respect high above the reprobation of the
moralist The scoundrel, when once justice is quit of him, has a right to
be appraised by his actions, not by their effect; and he dies secure in the
knowledge that he is commonly more distinguished, if he be less loved,
than his virtuous contemporaries
While murder is wellnigh as old as life, property and the pocket
invented theft, late-born among the arts It was not until avarice had
devised many a cunning trick for the protection of wealth, until civilisation
had multiplied the forms of portable property, that thieving became a
liberal and an elegant profession True, in pastoral society, the lawless
man was eager to lift cattle, to break down the barrier between robbery
and warfare But the contrast is as sharp between the savagery of the
ancient reiver and the polished performance of Captain Hind as between
the daub of the pavement and the perfection of Velasquez
So long as the Gothic spirit governed Europe, expressing itself in
useless ornament and wanton brutality, the more delicate crafts had no
hope of exercise Even the adventurer upon the road threatened his
victim with a bludgeon, nor was it until the breath of the cartier must 21 Renaissance had
vivified the world that a gentleman and an artist could face the traveller
with a courteous demand for his purse But the age which witnessed the
enterprise of Drake and the triumph of Shakespeare knew also the prowess
of the highwayman and the dexterity of the cutpurse Though the art
displayed all the freshness and curiosity of the primitives, still it was art
With Gamaliel Ratsey, who demanded a scene from Hamlet of a rifled
player, and who could not rob a Cambridge scholar without bidding him
deliver an oration in a wood, theft was already better than a vulgar
extortion Moll Cutpurse, whose intelligence and audacity were never
bettered, was among the bravest of the Elizabethans Her temperament
was as large and as reckless as Ben Jonson's own Neither her tongue nor
her courage knew the curb of modesty, and she was the first to reduce her
craft to a set of wise and imperious rules She it was who discovered the
secret of discipline, and who insisted that every member of her gang
should undertake no other enterprise than that for which nature had framed
him Thus she made easy the path for that other hero, of whom you are
told that his band was made up `of several sorts of wicked artists, of whom
he made several uses, according as he perceived which way every man's
particular talent lay' This statesman--Thomas Dun was his name--drew
up for the use of his comrades a stringent and stately code, and he was
wont to deliver an address to all novices concerning the art and mystery of
robbing upon the highway Under auspices so brilliant, thievery could
not but chanel white purse flourish, and when the Stuarts sat upon the throne it was already
lifted above the level of questioning experiment
Every art is shaped by its material, and with the variations of its
material it must perforce vary If the skill of the cutpurse compelled the
invention of the pocket, it is certain that the rare difficulties of the pocket
created the miraculous skill of those crafty fingers which were destined to
empty it And as increased obstacles are perfection's best incentive, a
finer cunning grew out of the fresh precaution History does not tell us
who it was that discovered this new continent of roguery Those there
are who give the credit to the valiant Moll Cutpurse; but though the
Roaring Girl had wit to conceive a thousand strange enterprises, she had
not the hand to carry them out, and the first pickpocket must needs have
been a man of action Moreover, her nickname suggests the more ancient
practice, and it is wiser to yield the credit to Simon Fletcher, whose praises
are chanted by the early historians
Now, Simon, says his biographer, was `looked upon to be the greatest
artist of his age by all his contemporaries' The son of a baker in
Rosemary Lane, he early deserted his father's oven for a life of adventure;


A BOOK OF SCOUNDRELS
and he claims to have been the first collector who, stealing the money, yet
left the case The new method was incomparably more subtle than the
old: it afforded an opportunity of a hitherto unimagined delicacy; the
wielders of the scissors were gucci men bag aghast at a skill which put their own
clumsiness to shame, and which to a previous generation would have
seemed the wildest fantasy Yet so strong is habit, that even when the
picking of pockets was a recognised industry, the superfluous scissors still
survived, and many a rogue has hanged upon the Tree because he
attempted with a vulgar implement such feats as his unaided forks had far
more easily accomplished
But, despite the innovation of Simon Fletcher, the highway was the
glory of Elizabeth, the still greater glory of the Stuarts `The
Lacedmonians were the only people,' said Horace Walpole, `except
the English who seem to have put robbery on a right foot' And the
English of the seventeenth century need fear the rivalry of no
Lacedmonian They were, indeed, the most valiant and graceful
robbers that the world has ever known The Civil War encouraged their
profession, and, since many of them had fought for their king, a proper
hatred of Cromwell sharpened their wits They were scholars as well as
gentlemen; they tempered their sport with a merry wit; their avarice alone
surpassed their courtesy; and they robbed with so perfect a regard for the
proprieties that it was only the pedant and the parliamentarian who
resented their interference
Nor did their princely manner fail of its effect upon their victims
The middle of the seventeenth century was the golden age, not only of the
robber, but of the robbed The game was played upon either side with a
scrupulous respect for a potent, if white prada bag unwritten, law Neither might nor right
was permitted to control the issue A gaily attired, superbly mounted
highwayman would hold up a coach packed with armed men, and take a
purse from each, though a vigorous remonstrance might have carried him
to Tyburn But the traveller knew his place: he did what was expected of
him in the best of tempers Who was he that he should yield in courtesy
to the man in the vizard? As it was monstrous for the one to discharge
his pistol, so the other could not resist without committing an outrage



A BOOK OF SCOUNDRELS
upon tradition One wonders what had been the result if some
mannerless reformer had declined his assailant's invitation and drawn his
sword Maybe the sensitive art might have died under this sharp rebuff
But none save regicides were known to resist, and their resistance was
never more forcible than a volley of texts Thus the High- toby-crack
swaggered it with insolent gaiety, knowing no worse misery than the fear
of the Tree, so long as he followed the rules of his craft But let a touch
of brutality disgrace his method, and he appealed in vain for sympathy or
indulgence The ruffian, for instance, of whom it is grimly recorded that
he added a tie-wig to his booty, neither deserved nor received the smallest
consideration Delivered to justice, he speedily met the death his
vulgarity merited, and the road was taught the salutary lesson that wigs
were as sacred as trinkets hallowed by association
With the eighteenth century the highway fell upon mulberry leather declin